OK. This is it. I've made some pretty big commitments to myself and it's time to put them in writing. I've never really made a new year's resolution before, but I guess that's what this is. I want to lose weight....SHOCKER! I've been talking about it for months now, so it's time to do something about it. It's a nice switch for me to be in a relationship with someone who TRULY doesn't care what size I am, but the truth is, I need to care. I think I realized I was at my low point when I was watching the season finale of The Biggest Loser, crying because I weigh as much or more than some of those women at their STARTING weight, and eating a gigantic slice of yellow cake with extra, extra chocolate icing. Who am I kidding? I've let it get out of control and it's time to make that change!
Financially, I'm pretty much screwed, but that has been that way for a long time. I'm positioning myself to do better than I ever have, so maybe this will be my year. I'm determined to be responsible and learn to budget and save my money. I hope to pay off some medical bills that I owe my ex-husband. NOTHING is worse than owing people money, except maybe owing an ex-spouse money!
I intend to finish my real estate classes and take my licensing exam before my birthday on February 1st. It WILL happen! I swear! It's all part of positioning myself for the future and being financially independent.
I intend to be more active in church, to learn more and try to contribute. I believe that part of worship is education. I want to soak up everything God intends for me and use it to make my life as rich as I know it can be.
I also have a prayer for the new year. It's not a resolution, because I'm not completely responsible for the result. I hope to make my daughter understand that I really do love her. That I'm not "just a Mom when it's convenient for me" as she says. I know in my heart she doesn't completely mean the things she says to me, and I know that her Dad has a lot to do with how she talks to me, but I know that I haven't always made the right choices where she's concerned. I just hope she sees that and can forgive me. I also hope I can forgive myself and be a part of the solution.
Wow. It's 11:52, I'm done and there are 'no misspellings found'. How about that?
Happy New Year!
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
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